Life is funny. During the summer I was excited to be going back to school, I was oddly looking forward to it. New school. New people. New professors. New everything. And now, I hate it. I hate that I don't know my way around. I hate being "new." I hate not knowing how things work in each professors class. Last year (fall and spring semesters) I was amazingly on task with school. I did really well--A's and B's. I was focused. This semester I must have senior-itis, even if I'm technically not a senior. I am not focused whatsoever. I have to motivation to study for my tests which results in low scores. I'm disappointed that I'm not disappointed in myself for this lack of motivation. I want to want to be motivated. I'm just not. And this is difficult. Though I've never liked school, I've always known how important it is for me to be there. I can't imagine my future without a degree.
I suppose I should see my advisor. Maybe if I have the end in sight I'll be more motivated. I'll want to get out and I'll work myself to do it.
Ultimately, I'd like to fast forward four years. Graduated. Married. Career-woman. Enjoying life.
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